How old is everbody?

[ExtraCrispy]

This is a very complicated and awkward question for me. Apologies if this is derailing the topic.

[fleetp]

[Pirate]

You’re only young once but the same can be said for being old. After that whatever you left behind isn’t alive with a mind of it’s own so whatever happens to it like for example a dog eats your bones doesn’t matter because you’re gone and have no use for it otherwise it wouldn’t have been there for the dog to eat. Enjoy everyday because life is short. The moment you were born is one step closer to the grave and each day is getting closer and closer. Here is some tips for old men in no particular order.

1. Grey hair just dye it

2 Ed Viagra or similar substitute , testosterone therapy, exercise, drop the bad habits, lose weight.

3 younger girls walk by the same as you don’t exist. Put a bag over your head and get somebody to lead you up to granny and ask her out. Go to the Philippines where age gap relationships aren’t frowned upon and many younger ladies see older farts as more mature and stable.

[ExtraCrispy]

[ExtraCrispy]

I don't come here for anything serious. Age is a serious topic.

[Pirate]

In a land of laughter and cheer,
There lived an old man, oh so dear.
With each passing day, he grew quite wise,
But alas, his farts became a surprise.

Once a master of the mighty toot,
His bottom played a merry flute.
But as the years went swiftly by,
His farts grew faint, oh me, oh my!

No longer could he let one rip,
His bottom lost its mighty grip.
He'd sit and strain, but nothing came,
His farts had vanished, what a shame!

The children laughed and asked him why,
His farts had bid a sad goodbye.
He smiled and said, "I'm old, you see,
My farts have taken leave of me."

But fear not, my little friends,
For this tale does not truly end.
Though his farts were gone, nevermore,
His wisdom grew, that's for sure.

He taught the children to be kind,
To laugh and love, and peace to find.
For farts may fade, but love remains,
And kindness in our hearts sustains.

So let us cherish every day,
And spread joy along the way.
For even if our farts depart,
Love and laughter fill our heart.

And when we're old, and farts are gone,
We'll still have memories to look upon.
For life's a journey, full of delight,
Even when our farts take flight.

[Pirate]

Breaking News: Credit Card Balances Reach New Heights, Surpassing $1 Trillion Mark!

In a shocking turn of events, credit card balances have skyrocketed to unprecedented levels, surpassing the jaw-dropping milestone of $1 trillion. Financial experts and consumers alike are scratching their heads, wondering how on earth this astronomical figure was reached.

Reports indicate that the sudden surge in credit card balances can be attributed to a series of hilarious mishaps and comical incidents. It seems that people across the nation have been engaging in some rather unconventional spending sprees.

One particularly memorable incident involved a man named Bob, who accidentally mistook his credit card for a magic wand while attempting to impress his friends at a party. With a grand flourish, he waved the card in the air, shouting, "Abracadabra, make it rain!" To his surprise, the card actually started dispensing cash, leading to an impromptu money shower that left everyone in awe. Bob's friends couldn't resist joining in the fun, swiping their cards to see if they too could summon a cash cascade.

Meanwhile, in a small town, a mischievous group of squirrels discovered a hidden stash of credit cards in a forgotten wallet. Fascinated by the shiny plastic, they embarked on a wild shopping spree, purchasing everything from acorn-shaped hats to tiny squirrel-sized Ferraris. The town's residents were left bewildered as they received unexpected credit card bills for squirrel-sized luxury items.

In another incident, a local prankster named Tim decided to play a practical joke on his friend, Sarah. He secretly replaced her credit card with a fake one that had an unlimited spending limit. Sarah, unaware of the switch, went on a shopping spree of epic proportions, buying everything from a pet giraffe to a private island. It wasn't until she received a call from her bank, asking if she was interested in purchasing the moon, that she realized something was amiss.

As news of these amusing incidents spread, people across the country couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity of it all. Social media platforms were flooded with memes and jokes about the "Trillion Dollar Credit Card Fiasco," with users sharing hilarious stories of their own credit card mishaps.

Financial experts, however, are urging caution and reminding everyone that credit card debt is no laughing matter. They advise consumers to use credit responsibly, avoid unnecessary spending, and pay off balances in a timely manner to avoid interest charges.

So, while the news of credit card balances surpassing $1 trillion may seem like a punchline, it serves as a reminder that financial responsibility is no joke. Let's hope that this amusing chapter in credit card history encourages us all to approach our spending habits with a healthy dose of humor and a touch of prudence.