More Pirate Jokes

[JonathanS]

Hope these aren't any repeats,

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A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum. The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?" "Arrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"

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A pirate captain walks into a bar with his first mate and they sit down at the bar. Now, the pirate captain has been a little down on his luck in the world of women, know what I mean? His first mate notices some lovely piratical wenches across the bar. "Arr, cap'n, you should go o'er thar and talk to her, ask her to dance, aye?" The captain replied "Arrrr, but what about me one eye? What if she makes fun of it?" "Don't worry cap'n," said the first mate. "She only has one leg! She won't say anything with that one peg leg." Convinced, the captain went over and immediately impressed the lady as pirates will do. He asked her if she'd like to dance. "Would EYE, Would EYE!" she exclaimed. "Oh yeah? Well... Peg Leg! Peg Leg!" replied the insulted captain!

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A pirate walks into a bar with a mangy, infected parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "You shouldn't be that close to something so disgusting, such a low-life animal." The pirate says, "Arr, it's ok, he's had his shots." Then the bartender says... "I was talking to the parrot!"

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How do pirates like their ham?

Carrrrrrved!

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Do any of ye have this keyboard?

http://www.defectiveyeti.com/archives/000656.html

[Dunkel]

Is there a "groan" smiley?

[ShipForBrains]

Tho this string is a bit dated, I thought I would add my favorite pirate joke!


A pirate walked up to his Captain in suprise and said, "Ahoy Capt'n... you've got a steering wheel sticking out of your pants!"

And the Captain replied, "Arrrrg, it's driving me nuts!"